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day's calculations and binations than you habitually show yourself to
be； if you were a carpenter。'
'A carpenter！' repeated Mr Merdle； checking something like a groan。
'I shouldn't so much mind being a carpenter； Mrs Merdle。'
'And my plaint is；' pursued the lady； disregarding the low remark；
'that it is not the tone of Society； and that you ought to correct
it； Mr Merdle。 If you have any doubt of my judgment； ask even Edmund
Sparkler。' The door of the room had opened； and Mrs Merdle now surveyed
the head of her son through her glass。 'Edmund； we want you here。'
Mr Sparkler； who had merely put in his head and looked round the room
without entering （as if he were searching the house for that young lady
with no nonsense about her）； upon this followed up his head with his
body； and stood before them。 To whom； in a few easy words adapted to his
capacity； Mrs Merdle stated the question at issue。
The young gentleman； after anxiously feeling his shirt…collar as if it
were his pulse and he were hypochondriacal； observed； 'That he had heard
it noticed by fellers。'
'Edmund Sparkler has heard it noticed；' said Mrs Merdle； with languid
triumph。 'Why； no doubt everybody has heard it noticed！' Which in truth
was no unreasonable inference； seeing that Mr Sparkler would probably be
the last person； in any assemblage of the human species； to receive an
impression from anything that passed in his presence。
'And Edmund Sparkler will tell you； I dare say；' said Mrs Merdle； waving
her favourite hand towards her husband； 'how he has heard it noticed。'
'I couldn't；' said Mr Sparkler； after feeling his pulse as before；
'couldn't undertake to say what led to it……'cause memory desperate
loose。 But being in pany with the brother of a doosed fine gal……well
educated too……with no biggodd nonsense about her……at the period alluded
to……'
'There！ Never mind the sister；' remarked Mrs Merdle； a little
impatiently。 'What did the brother say？'
'Didn't say a word； ma'am；' answered Mr Sparkler。 'As silent a feller as
myself。 Equally hard up for a remark。'
'Somebody said something；' returned Mrs Merdle。 'Never mind who it was。'
（'Assure you I don't in the least；' said Mr Sparkler。）
'But tell us what it was。'
Mr Sparkler referred to his pulse again； and put himself through some
severe mental discipline before he replied：
'Fellers referring to my Governor……expression not my own……occasionally
pliment my Governor in a very handsome way on being immensely rich
and knowing……perfect phenomenon of Buyer and Banker and that……but say
the Shop sits heavily on him。 Say he carried the Shop about； on his back
rather……like Jew clothesmen with too much business。'
'Which；' said Mrs Merdle； rising； with her floating drapery about her；
'is exactly my plaint。 Edmund； give me your arm up…stairs。'
Mr Merdle； left alone to meditate on a better conformation of himself to
Society； looked out of nine windows in succession； and appeared to
see nine wastes of space。 When he had thus entertained himself he went
down…stairs； and looked intently at all the carpets on the ground…floor；
and then came up…stairs again； and looked intently at all the carpets
on the first…floor； as if they were gloomy depths； in unison with his
oppressed soul。 Through all the rooms he wandered； as he always did；
like the last person on earth who had any business to approach them。 Let
Mrs Merdle announce； with all her might； that she was at Home ever
so many nights in a season； she could not announce more widely and
unmistakably than Mr Merdle did that he was never at home。
At last he met the chief butler； the sight of which splendid retainer
always finished him。 Extinguished by this great creature； he sneaked
to his dressing…room； and there remained shut up until he rode out to
dinner； with Mrs Merdle； in her own handsome chariot。 At dinner； he was
envied and flattered as a being of might； was Treasuried； Barred； and
Bishoped； as much as he would； and an hour after midnight came home
alone； and being instantly put out again in his own hall； like a
rushlight； by the chief butler； went sighing to bed。
CHAPTER 34。 A Shoal of Barnacles
Mr Henry Gowan and the dog were established frequenters of the cottage；
and the day was fixed for the wedding。 There was to be a convocation of
Barnacles on the occasion； in order that that very high and very large
family might shed as much lustre on the marriage as so dim an event was
capable of receiving。
To have got the whole Barnacle family together would have been
impossible for two reasons。 Firstly； because no building could have held
all the members and connections of that illustrious house。 Secondly；
because wherever there was a square yard of ground in British occupation
under the sun or moon； with a public post upon it； sticking to that post
was a Barnacle。 No intrepid navigator could plant a flag…staff upon any
spot of earth； and take possession of it in the British name； but
to that spot of earth； so soon as the discovery was known； the
Circumlocution Office sent out a Barnacle and a despatch…box。 Thus the
Barnacles were all over the world； in every direction……despatch…boxing
the pass。
But； while the so…potent art of Prospero himself would have failed in
summoning the Barnacles from every speck of ocean and dry land on
which there was nothing （except mischief） to be done and anything to be
pocketed； it was perfectly feasible to assemble a good many Barnacles。
This Mrs Gowan applied herself to do； calling on Mr Meagles frequently
with new additions to the list； and holding conferences with that
gentleman when he was not engaged （as he generally was at this period）
in examining and paying the debts of his future son…in…law； in the
apartment of scales and scoops。
One marriage guest there was； in reference to whose presence Mr Meagles
felt a nearer interest and concern than in the attendance of the most
elevated Barnacle expected； though he was far from insensible of the
honour of having such pany。 This guest was Clennam。 But Clennam had
made a promise he held sacred； among the trees that summer night； and；
in the chivalry of his heart； regarded it as binding him to many implied
obligations。 In forgetfulness of himself； and delicate service to her on
all occasions； he was never to fail； to begin it； he answered Mr Meagles
cheerfully； 'I shall e； of course。'
His partner； Daniel Doyce； was something of a stumbling…block in Mr
Meagles's way； the worthy gentleman being not at all clear in his own
anxious mind but that the mingling of Daniel with official Barnacleism
might produce some explosive bination； even at a marriage breakfast。
The national offender； however； lightened him of his uneasiness by
ing down to Twickenham to represent that he begged； with the freedom
of an old friend； and as a favour to one； that he might not be invited。
'For；' said he； 'as my business with this set of gentlemen was to do a
public duty and a public service； and as their business with me was to
prevent it by wearing my soul out； I think we had better not eat and
drink together with a show of being of one mind。' Mr Meagles was much
amused by his friend's oddity； and patronised him with a more protecting
air of allowance than usual； when he rejoined： 'Well； well； Dan； you
shall have your own crotchety way。'
To Mr Henry Gowan； as the time approached； Clennam tried to convey
by all quiet and unpretending means； that he was frankly and
disinterestedly desirous of tendering him any friendship he would
accept。 Mr Gowan treated him in return with his usual ease； and with his
usual show of confidence； which was no confidence at all。
'You see； Clennam；' he happened to remark in the course of conversation
one day； when they were walking near the Cottage within a week of the
marriage； 'I am a disappointed man。 That you know already。'
'Upon my word；' said Clennam； a little embarrassed； 'I scarcely know
how。'
'Why；' returned Gowan； 'I belong to a clan； or a clique； or a family； or
a connection； or whatever you like to call it； that might have provided
for me in any one of fifty ways； and that took it into its head not to
do it at all。 So here